SNIPPETS

MARCH 8,  2010

NEW YORK, March 7 (UPI) -- Dozens of wild chickens set to be moved from a New York parking lot to an upstate sanctuary were recaptured after attempting a mass escape, volunteers say.

You know New York is in trouble when even the chickens try to escape.  They don't like corrupt government either.

MARCH 7,  2010

LONDON, March 6 (UPI) -- A London official says the city's taxi cab drivers may be required to take courses on how to remain quiet while transporting passengers.

MARCH 6,  2010

From Fox News:  NEW YORK — An affluent housewife in Long Island, New York, accused of hiring a hit man to off her hubby lamented she could only afford to maim him — but then was thrilled to learn she could whack him at a bargain-basement price of just $20,000, authorities told the New York Post. 

This shows the importance of comparative shopping.  Never accept the first price.

MARCH 5,  2010

CANTERBURY, England, March 4 (UPI) -- British police said a kick from a man in a gorilla suit helped police catch a suspect fleeing from a fight at a supermarket.  Canterbury police said a 24-year-old man was arrested on suspicion of assault and resisting arrest with the help of Andy Ingham, 30, who was dressed in a gorilla suit on a street corner Feb. 18 to promote his gym, Fit4Less, to commuters, Kentnews.co.uk reported Thursday.

You don't know what confidence a good gorilla suit gives a man. 

MARCH 4,  2010

Major public statement: 

WELLINGTON, New Zealand (AP) -- Tiger Woods's caddie said he knew nothing about the golfer's extramarital affairs and was angry with him over the scandal. 

I thought you'd like to know the feelings of Tiger's caddy.  This is important news.

MARCH 3,  2010

From Fox:  An investigation is underway after a child was heard giving instructions to a pilot from the air-traffic control tower at one of America's busiest airports.  In a recording that has been confirmed as genuine by the Federal Aviation Administration, the child makes five transmissions from John F Kennedy International Airport — with the pilots in each case all responding enthusiastically to him.

What's so unusual about that?  Children are heard in the halls of Congress all the time.